Time just flys by

Steven's last day of elementary school is 4 school day saway. This little guy 6 years ago was in tears because I think he realized that Mom's little daytime fun was about to end.

Personally I miss the snuggles, the trips to get 2 small fries and a bottle of water and hitting the park with Papa Tom and Stevie Pie. He asked me to come to his final day and sit with him and watch the talent show, listen to him sing and eat cake. I was going to get this made into a t-shirt to wear next week.

Next fall all 3 will be in middle school, riding together on the bus. what will I do with all my extra time... Oh yeah, Cold Stone.

Steven

Catherine was cleaning out my closet and came up with a ton of pictures. I can't believe how cute my kids are!

Steven had such a large head it's hard not to get sucked into his smile and bright green eyes!

We watched old video's on Sunday night because we had nothing else to do and we came up with the simple fact is that Steven came into this world beyond loved by his brother and sister. (or as in the old movies said it "brudder and sissser)

Take Father's Day. Every year (before Cold Stone) we used to go to our local airport and spend the day looking at airplanes and eating hotdogs. This picture is right after Steven's first birthday. How can you not look at this and you not go "awww" . Steve has this ability to make you laugh with the most unexpected things. He would just hop on Papa's lap and "honk" or press on his nose.

He's wait awhile and then in the middle of sentence just come up and push it again.

It was a consensus last night. Steve just makes us smile.

The forgotten generation

I don't care what they say, they may be war vertrans from WWII, they are still the most undercared for people in the nation. There are not enough resources avaiable and they do not have the technology training, they don't have computers, or they don't have relatives that give a crap. I see the hallways and entry ways filled with people on scooters, walkers or sitting and knitting. Every time the door opens they are there with a smile ready to greet you. All races, all creeds and all colors.

There was an incident a month back that required me to advocate for my father. The building manager took my father's bed and bedding. they gave him no written notice, no understanding why. He slept in his chair for 4 nights before I found out. Had I not taken him shopping that week, I woudl have never known. Bottom line, the manager did not follow city codes/rules when dealing with the situation and was disciplined. My dad gets a new bed this weekend. He is profoundly deaf.

The kids and I stopped by on Thursday to drop by some odds and ends he needed. He was positively giddy seeing the kids, and as small as his apartment is, they were messing with everything, helping him sweep, dust, mop and get stuff off the higher shelves.

I think he will die in that apartment. He's not a social creature. He values his privacy. So, as his advocate and his loving daughter I will respect that wish, and his grandkids will take one afternoon a week and go over and help him with the little things.

wow.

That's about all I can say.

Since I last logged in to update we had an all you can eat event, wrapped up Valentine's Day, brought back 2 old employees to help out this spring, Daniel was assaulted and bullied in school, conferences, in the process of getting product from my store from the black market because they advertised something on tv, radio and print they can't supply to the stores.. .everyone is out, I met a mother of a daughter who was fighting to get her daughter diagnosed without going insane with docs wanting to medicate rather than treat her Autism with ADHD drugs and a Boy scout election.

It's been insane. Literally. I have had days were every minute is accounted for literally every minute, and then had to squeeze something else in to boot. Like a panic attack this a.m. and a driving need to get stuff done.

This morning I woke at 5 a.m. in a panic that I wouldn't have enough frosting for the cake orders for today, I ran into the store a 5:30 adn discovered that I didn't, I then sat in the store doing paperwork until Sams Club opened at 7 a.m., they were out so I schlepped my butt to the other side of town (20 minute drive) found it, then ran back to the side of town I was in at 7 a.m. to pick up my son at 8 a.m. from an overnight for Boy Scouts at a Church. It's 8:20 a.m. which means I have dumped off one kid, picked up another and am in the store. Where was Jeff? Laying on the couch complaining he had to work at 10 a.m. He's overwhelmed. He got off at 7 last night and bitched about having to come into the store to take out the trash (it was dark) because if I go into the store for 10 minutes it turns into 3 hours.

I have 11 cakes to frost, a store to get set up and a mind to put together before I open in 2 hours. Oh yeah, did I mention that I took a cake order and the woman hung up before she told me what kind of cake and caller ID said it was for a hospital that has THOUSANDS of employees. There is no tracking her down.

Yup. It never ends. Catherine is screaming for time with me. The kids literally lay on top of me from the time I get home until I kick them off the bed at midnight because I need sleep. I am looking for a bright spot. I have to stop my talking and thoughts because the follow me around with little stories of thier day that I would kick myself if I missed them and Jeff isn't the "talking or listening" kind of guy.

I do have a few bright spots.

1. Daniel was elected Quartermaster and Assistant Patrol Leader.
2. I realized Dan and Steve can go to many Point together from July 26- Aug 1st.
3. My sheets were clean thanks to my daughter, my bed was made.
4. I was able to color my hair, take a bath and read a book last night.
5. Sams Club had their rotisserie Chicken salad for cheap this morning.YUM!
6. Steve is here with me. That's always a source of joy! He makes me remember how much I forget to laugh these days. Every night and every morning, that kid is there ready to make me laugh with exasperation...and wonder how his mind really does work. He just walked past with his butt clenched saying "I think I waited too long"

Yup.

I think it's time to start the day..

Much Ado About Nothing

I can't actually say that I have been doing nothing as the entire workings of Cold Stone, the kids and life have fallen on my shoulders. Nothing could have been more evident of this as me spending the last 72 hours before Valentines Day making cakes and cupcakes and Valentines Night I had to BEG, literally BEG... Jeff to come in and take care of dishes so the 4 of us could handle the customers and I was exhausted to start with. He whined the entire time and left the store without finishing the job he was to do. He said he was tired. he worked from 6 to 3 p.m. had an hour for lunch and a 3 hour nap and dinner before he came in at 7 p.m. to help. the 4 of us crammed cold pizza in our mouths between customers.

Catherine (my savior) was at the store with my from 9 a.m. until 10 p.m. (and came every day after school and helped until 9 p.m. each day) frosting cupcakes, cakes and helping me keep the lobby clean. We ended up selling 366 cakes, and 192 6 packs of cupcakes. All of which we make in the store by hand. I had 2 other crew members but it was just the 4 of us that did the work. It was our second largest day to date in sales.

Every day since then it's been a non stop catch up and preparing for our "ALL YOU CAN EAT FOR $5 - FAT TUESDAY" event.

A Co-op meeting, Steven's crossing over to Boy Scouts, City chamber meetings, shopping for jeans (and clothes) for all 3 kids, a meeting with the police leasion officer at Plymouth about Dan being assaulted and bullied in school and an all night ski party with Dan and the Boy Scouts. Factor in 45 hour work week at the store and now Daniel has the flu and is at home. It's been a rough week.

I have yet to see an American Idol show in it's entirety. I thought I was going to see it last week, but I got a call from the store and had to go in and last night I had the cross over and caught the last 15 minutes and Jeff wanted us to be quiet so he coudl watch it. I SWEAR if he doesn't move his butt off the couch soon I am going to throw away the couch. The kids and I could care less, we don't sit on it. Jeff would walk around in circles lost if it dissapeared. the thought made us giggle a little.

The kids are pretty upset as well, sassing back. I can't blame them and find myself having a hard time defending thier father and that he works 40 hours a week and gets 2 days off needing a vacation.

I can't recall the last time I had a day off when the store was open.

Tomrrow will be brighter...and warmer.

Here's an excercise for you.

Sit down with your kids over a pizza and pop and start a discussion, take a sheet of paper and write down names of people in your family (extended too) and ask them to tell you what they will remember most about those people.

You will be amazed what they say. Put it in an envelope and put it in your family bible. Next year do the same thing. Then compare. The kids will learn that thier perception of what's important changes as they get older.

The picture above. Those are my fingers. At times I lose my mind and draw faces on my fingers than treat them like little friends. I stick them in a cup of cold water, up my nose, all the time I pretend they are screaming "No, No.. I'm afraid of the dark"

It really lightens the mood in emergency rooms, docrotrs offices or just when your about to lose your mind.

Try it!

Case in Point PBS leads to trouble. Maybe.

My little Princess.

We always have been a PBS family. Arthur Reed, Teletubbies, Zaboomafoo, Banana's in Pajamas, Sesame Street and anything else that came on.

At one point the kids were obsessed with National Geographic stuff. They were showing blow pipes and people using them. Catherine not to be outdone, stripped off all her clothes except her diaper, went and got her headdress and the handle from one of her toys and got some cotton balls. She went so far as to go outside and rub her face with dirt from the flower beds. That obsessed look on her face was her absorbing more of the "culture".

I love PBS

Relish

At the kids middle school the kids who have better than a D average and less than 15 tardies (unexcused) are treated to a day of fun.

Personally, I think that a D is way too low and there is no excuse for being late.

But Catherine had a 3.58 and Dan has a 3.16 average and no tardies so they got to go. Those are my super kids! They had open bowling for 3 hours for 240 kids, I provided single scoops of Cold Stone ice cream.

Daniel

Daniel had the chance to "Do a Good Turn" and help out Ron Schara, a MN icon when it comes to the outdoors since he started writing for the Tribune in 1968. Daniel helped with the fishing clinic at the OutDoorsman Show at the Excel Energy center. Steve, Catherine and I went wandering around dreaming of vacations, campers and boats. Then settled for some nachos and warm fountain water in a bottle we brought with.

Daniel was just glowing and adorable in his class A's. We couldn't pass up the chance for an autograph, a scratch of his dog Raven (the granddaugher of the original Raven). The dog was so patient. Ron was so personable and very knowledgeable about boy scouts. He lives next to the Rum River Boy scout campground.

Very cool.

67 Dodge Polara

Look at the grill on this. This is a REAL car.

My dream car. Next to my Bel Air, this is my dream car.

A 1967 Dodge Polara.

I had one once in 1984, she lasted me 2 years and cost me $35.00. It was big, it was steel, it went very fast and it seated up to 10 of my closest friends and I was able to stuff 4 humans into the trunk to get into the drive in. I also had to use a screwdriver to hold the butterfly on the choke to get it started when it was humid, it sucked gas, it was this color yellow, it only had an A.M. radio.

I loved the bench seats the massive steering wheel, the chrome inside and out. She always started no matter the weather. God, I miss her.

Neglecting ones-self

I figured it out today. I have been neglecting myself. Wait, I have this Epiphany every time I am forced to go to the doctor, dentist or PT because I literally can't function anymore without some "upkeep".

I keep telling myself that it's all about the kids, the business, the functioning of my well oiled machine I like to call my life.

In reality, I spent over an hour in the dentists chair with my mouth open, I have enough Novocaine that I sound like a drunk person (or mentally challenged) and I have a freaking monster of a headache coming on and a 14 hour day ahead of me.

It was $1,500 in dental work, of which they will only cover $400. After 9 years, I needed to go in. I put myself first. It's going to set us back a house payment to get my teeth in order. I know for a fact that if your teeth and gums aren't in good shape it affects your health. My mom is proof of that. One she got her top teeth removed she pinked up, she was in a much better mood and she just looked healthier.

I can preach all I want, I can promise myself, but how does a Mom actually tell her kids that she needs mommy time by herself? Put my pair of new pants before my kids school supplies, or a YMCA membership instead of extra money in their lunch account because school lunches are not geared towards filling the child up. A pint of milk for a 13 year old boy is NOT enough.

I know everyone is feeling this pinch with the economy, but owning a business it's even more a struggle to justify the Target economy underwear vs. the ones that are more expensive and you really, really like and will last longer, or you hot glue gun the underwire in your bra because the $20 for a new one is just highway robbery when the rest of the bra is fine. Sounds silly, having to not feel bad about missing time with the kids for the sake of locking myself in the downstairs bath with a book for 2 hours just to relax away from the constant mess and commotion, but I do.

I haven't spoken to a good friend of mine for 2 years because she just didn't get it. I need my shoulder operated on. I need PT on it to strengthen it before they will do surgery, but I do not have the $30 per appointment that is the co-pay, $60 a week, $240 a month to repair my shoulder. I can't just charge it, the money has to come from somewhere. I couldn't get her to understand that I can't just hire a manager at 20K a year to cover the store because I need to be out for 6-8 weeks after the surgery, plus rehab costs, the deductibles and co-pays that are associated with the surgery. That 20K would buy Jeff and I new transportation.... plus a myriad of other things that NEED to be replaced to literally function.

I wouldn't be able to work. My friend didn't get it that I don't draw a salary now, but for 2 months I woudln't work, plus paying someone else to do what I do.

Charging it is not tha answer either...the Visa bill can't just get the minimum payment each month because you need the money that you would have paid the Visa bill with for something that you "deserve". My questions is.... what's the next big thing you will need to remain "feeling good about yourself" after you get what you deserve? What good is a 10 day vacation you have to charge and stress about paying for the next year?

Some items are upkeep, or issues that you have te deal with to live... but unless it's pressing, do you really need it? Comfort vs. function. I tkills me when people bitch about money then paint thier homes, redecorate to make themselves feel better, then turn to pay the bills and they feel worse surrounded by the things that got them to where they are now.

As the Novocaine is wearing off (slowly), sitting in my Thrift store clothes with my shoes falling apart, ready to put in my 6 th day in a row open to close at the store, while stuffing in all the to-do's to keep the House running, Catherine's blood sugars in check, Daniel's autism and immune system issues and Steven's migraine's (which he was weeping in pain most of the night and this morning, and I didn't sleep because he's my child and he's hurting) there's not much time for anything else or money in the account to do it with.

We did get ourselves into this position with the store, but it would be sure nice to get a break. Anything.

The capper on this below zero week is my father's car finally dying. It's in our driveway now, I'll post a "post mortem" picture. So I am off to start hunting for a $500 car that will get my 82 year old father around. Oy.

Back to the Dog

Barney has no concept of " personal space". There is very little personal space in our home. The bathroom isn't a sacred place. The only time he isn't with you is when the door is shut... all the way. Then he just sits outside and waits until you are done.

With Steven it's about rough and tumble. The only time he's on Steve is if he's too lazy to move. barney tries to steer clear of Steve. Being near Steve means you will be wearing human clothes. Barney is a good sport.

There is a hierarchy in Barney's world. People who he sleeps with, warms up with and goes to just to mess with. Jeff is a pushover....he knows that Jeff will pass out bits of his food from his plate and accommodate his odd sleeping habits.With Jeff he is a sleeper. It's about serious nap time. He usually is between Jeff's feet, but at times Jeff is in a real bed, then it's a free for all, but it's nap time.

With Catherine it's about just being near her. We keep it very very cold in the house. Often the kids will sleep in hooded sweatshirts. We have horrible insulation. We would have to rip all the walls out and re insulate them. He usually starts out with Catherine. As Jeff snacks after we go to bed Barney heads to the living room.

Again, with me, it's about having his nose shoved up my nose. When it's time to wrestle, scratch tummy, he's on my bed.

Someday we will have to teach him some manners.

This is the house that Jeff built

This is the house that Jeff built.

He built a scale model of Greg and Stacey's home on Mille Lacs and made it a bird feeder. Took abotu 30 hours and everyone (but me, I was at the store every night) helped cut, glue, nail and paint.

Christmas this year was a home made Christmas. After speaking with some other families, this theme was not only at our home but friends of our family and kids said the same thing. It was not about what they didn't get, it was the thought behind where it came from. One boy last night got 3 things for Christmas. The "coolest" thing in his mind was a bar of chocolate that came from Arabia. A friend of his mother spend alot of time traveling all over Europe and loves to ski. She sent it to him.

Amazing.

This teenage boy did not sound resentful, but rather raved about how good it was.

I felt more blessed, for my kids of course, but the friends and acquaintances that we have surrounded ourselves with. They have the same circumstances, values and children who understand that it's not the dollar amount spent, or who has the latest gadget, but where it comes from.

The heart counts for so much.

The conversation went like this:

Paul: So Dan, what did you get for Christmas?

Dan: [I anticipated a meek answer or no answer] I got a whole can of Grandma's scotcharoos, Homemade Toffee from Grandma Stockdill's recipe, a snowmobile party, a fancy dinner at the Ridgeview and a new pillow.

Paul: Got any of the scotachoo's left?

Dan: Nope I ate them all.

Paul: That's cool. I got a Chocolate Bar from Arabia. I was soooo good.

The End.